? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Too much gin, very little bucket
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
