I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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