Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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