i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
My feet surprised me
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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