I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize