He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Randomize
