ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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