Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize