you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
