Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
i will never coherently bang her
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
