So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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