Kareoke will never be a sober sport
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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