he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
