I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
