Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
