More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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