Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Randomize
