I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Bring me that man meat
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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