Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
