Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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