He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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