His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
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