i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
