If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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