so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
