he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
