do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
