I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
