are you still at the devil's house?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
