you mean i was at the winter classic?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
