are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
We had to coat check the pizza.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
