Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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