Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize