The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
