Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Randomize