That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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