I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
