u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
