S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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