Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize