I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
