Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Randomize