loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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