i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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