another moral hangover. fuck.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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