This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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