You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
