i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
