Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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