I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
